


Five Lies That You Tell Her

by UnmovingGreatLibrary



Category: Touhou Project
Genre: Biting, Developing Relationship, Drunken Flirting, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Marriage of Convenience, Massage, POV Second Person, Present Tense, Sweat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-02
Updated: 2014-11-02
Packaged: 2018-02-23 14:07:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2550332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UnmovingGreatLibrary/pseuds/UnmovingGreatLibrary
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yukari has guided a dozen generations of Hakurei shrine maidens and has plenty of experience at lying to them. So why's it so hard with Reimu?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. "I wouldn't lie to you.”

It takes time with Reimu, just like it did with her mother, and her mother before her.

She doesn't trust you. It's only natural for the Hakurei shrine maiden to distrust a youkai, especially the youkai who lowered the barrier between Gensokyo and the Netherworld. But everybody has a weakness, if you know where to look. Even you.

Reimu's is food, but she's still suspicious when you appear in the middle of the shrine one day, with a cardboard box in your arms. "What are _you_ doing here?"

"Hmm? Isn't it obvious?" You kneel in front of her table and settle the box on top of it, then unfold the flaps. "Souvenirs from the outside world."

Reimu tries her best to act uninterested, but you can still see a greedy sparkle in her eyes. It's the biggest haul you've ever shown her: heaps of chip bags, two chocolate assortments layered on top of each other, bags of candy, box after box of cookies, candy bars, and pocky... it's probably the most sugar that Gensokyo has ever had in one place. Her hand hovers just short of grabbing something. "What's this about?"

"Hmm?" You unwrap a piece of taffy; the smell of strawberry fills the room before you pop it into your mouth. You savor the taste—just the right amounts of sweet and sour, the perfect delicate balance—for a moment before you start to chew. "Do I need a reason?"

"Most youkai are more interested in coming here to eat my food than bringing me food.”

“Consider it a reward for all of your hard work,” you say, with just an edge of a teasing lilt. After swallowing the taffy, you grab a chocolate. The second you tug the two ends of the wrapper to open it, you can almost see Reimu's hand twitch toward the box. “I was also hoping to speak with you about the partnership that I proposed.”

“Aha, so it's a bribe,” Reimu says, sounding quite proud at herself. You don't argue; it is, in a way, and it's best for both of you if the girl remembers that you have ulterior motives. Even so, the realization seems to help her get over her reservations, and she rips the wrapping off of one of the larger candy bars and takes a bite before she says, “Not interested.”

“Oh? You take advantage of my generosity and _then_ turn me down? That's rather shameless, don't you think?” You push the chocolate into your mouth and give her The Smile. You perfected it centuries before she was born. It's the smile that says that you're so infinitely calm and patient that you are merely indulging her by even noticing that you should be upset. “Couldn't you at least hear me out?”

Reimu eyes you suspiciously as she rips open a bag of chips. “If you want to sit there and talk while I eat, I guess it wouldn't hurt anything. Don't think that I'm going to listen, though.”

You allow your smile to broaden a little now, just to infuriate the girl. “I'm honored. I think that my proposal was for me to help train you and lend you my knowledge of youkai, yes?” You stop eating for now and fold your hands in your lap. “Tell me, why did you turn down my assistance?”

“You're a youkai,” Reimu says, without hesitation. She pops a chip in her mouth, and makes a show of eating a few more before she adds, “Taking youkai-hunting advice from a youkai would be kind of pointless.”

You should be upset at her refusal, but she reminds you too much of her ancestors right now. Training for youkai-hunting from a young age does instil a certain... rigidness. “Well, certainly you know by now that youkai don't all get along with each other.”

“Don't care.” Reimu pops another chip in her mouth.

“And since I've lived hundreds of years, I've had enough time to learn more about youkai than you'll ever know.”

“Huh.”

You can see that she's not even paying attention, but you expected this and came prepared. Beneath the table, you reach into a gap, and your fingertips brush against the rim of a saucer. The second you pull it into the room, the dark scent of rich chocolate fills the room, overwhelming the subtler ones coming from the box. It's a thick, substantial wedge of temptation, half a dozen layers of chocolate cake with rich icing glistening between them. The top is covered with chocolate shavings, darker chocolate piping, and for a little contrast, dainty swirls of white chocolate. You sit the saucer carefully on the table, produce a fork from the gap, raise it slowly, and—

“... what _is_ that?” It took you hours to find the exact right cake for this purpose, but the moment you see Reimu's expression, you know that you chose well. She isn't even trying to hide her interest.

“Hmm? Just a treat I brought back for myself.” You allow the edge of the fork to lower toward the cake, and you can practically see her wince. “Why?”

“Huh? O-oh. Just wondering,” Reimu says. She turns away and pops another chip into her mouth.

Slowly, you cut off the tip of the cake, applying just enough pressure to make the icing bulge out between the layers before you scoop the whole thing up with the fork. She watches out of the corner of her eye as you lift it toward your mouth... and you stop. “Hmm, you know,” you say, with deliberate casualness, “I could get a cake like this any time, but it occurs to me that you probably haven't had any before. Would you like this slice?”

Reimu turns to look more openly at the cake now, and you can see the conflicting priorities warring in her head. “You're still trying to bribe me, aren't you?”

“Well, what if I am,” you say, and enjoy yourself watching her eyes follow the tip of the fork. “If I give you the cake, will you agree to actually listen to what I have to say?”

She hesitates, but you can tell that her resistance is broken. “I'll listen, but that's it. I'm still not going to work with a youkai.”

“Ah, well. That will be good enough for now.” Even so, you continue raising the bite of cake upward. As it approaches your mouth, Reimu tenses up

You're parting your lips by the time she starts leaning across the table. “H-hey, you said you'd give that to me!”

Hah. You finally got a rise out of her. With a flourish, you turn the fork around in your fingers and offer the bite to her. “Consider this your first lesson, shrine maiden: You can trust me. I wouldn't lie to you.”


	2. "You are only a tool."

Tonight has been the most fighting you've done in decades. You usually make a point of battling alongside every new shrine maiden to get an idea of their strength, anyway, but the fact that the moon was involved this time... well. There was no chance that you were going to sit this one out. Getting to observe Reimu's fighting style from the friendly end was just an added bonus.

Now, though, it's all done, the real moon is back in the sky, and you've allowed time to start creeping slowly forward. It's been a long night, but Reimu is practically bouncing as she opens the door and enters the shrine. Even before she finds a lantern, the full moon gives plenty of light for you to see that she's grinning.

"That wasn't too bad," she says, as she sprawls on the floor. 

“You did well,” you say with a smile. “How are you feeling?”

“Huh? I'm fine.”

“Are you, now.” Now that there's a little more light, you can see exactly how much the unending night has taken out of her. You might have won, but she still has a dozen shallow scratches peeking through tears in her clothes. Hours of flying have left her hair messy, and the exertion has left a grime of sweat drying on her skin. Hmm. “Ran will be here soon with sake, but maybe we should take care of you first. You look like a mess.”

She lifts her head just enough to look down at herself, then gives a one-shouldered shrug. “I'm fine,” she says, then eyes you irritably. “I seem to remember that you did a lot worse to me that time that we fought. You weren't so concerned back then, huh?”

“Ancient history,” you say, with a deliberately infuriating dismissiveness. It's barely been half a year since then. She scowls, but undeterred, you kneel down behind her. “Now, sit up and take off your top.”

“... what?”

You give her a reproachful little whack on the forehead with your folded fan. “It wasn't a request.”

She holds your gaze defiantly, then sits up with a sigh and starts sliding out of her clothes. “If this is something weird, it's not too late to exterminate you, you know.”

Bit by bit, she unwinds her sarashi, and you get a direct look at her naked back. It has a few bruises on it, but at her age, they'll heal within days. More noteworthy is the way every muscle is tensed. Even now, safe in her own home, she's trembling with pent-up energy. She's probably still coming down from the adrenaline rush. It's no wonder—she just fought a Lunar sage and an immortal princess, after all.

Without giving her time to object, you rest your hands on Reimu's shoulders and give them a squeeze. She tenses up until your thumbs press into her back, applying just the right pressure as you rub them in a circle. Slowly, your hands work their way outward, kneading and squeezing the soreness out of the muscles along her shoulder blades. Just as slowly, you can feel her slump down as she finally relaxes. “A massage? Really?”

“Are you complaining?”

“Not really. … maybe you're getting soft, though.”

Your first impulse is to tease her right back, but you hesitate as you start working around a dark, fresh bruise. This girl just risked her life to keep Gensokyo safe. Most of the other humans will probably never know, let alone thank her. Under the circumstances, a back massage is the least you can do. “Maybe I am,” you admit.

“Hmh.” She makes a smug-sounding little grunt and rolls her shoulders as you move down and past them. “I doubt anybody would believe me if I told them about this anyway.”

“Well, if another incident started tomorrow and you were too stiff to get out of bed, it would leave me in a bit of a bind, mmh?”

“So the great and _fearsome_ Yukari Yakumo can never own up to being nice, huh?”

You stay silent as your hands work around another bruise. From a collision with her own yin-yang orb during an ill-timed dodge, you think. A little harder and she might have broken a rib; not the sort of thing that ends well when you're flying. It would barely even be unusual. You can remember half a dozen of her ancestors who were dead by this age. The lives of teenage youkai hunters tend to be short and spectacular.

It's only one of the many reasons that it's not a good idea for you to get too close to the Hakurei shrine maidens.

“Reimu,” you say, and deliberately inject a little cold venom into your voice. “Please don't misunderstand this situation. I depend on you to maintain the balance of Gensokyo and the barrier. To me, you are only a tool.”

You can feel her stiffen up in shock, then wilt slightly under your hands, but all she says is, “Right... of course.”

It's better this way, you promise yourself.


	3. "It was only the alcohol."

Reimu's victorious return from the moon is quite the occasion. Between the impromptu pool party in the Scarlet Devil Mansion, your supplies of stolen Lunar sake, and everybody competing to top each other's stories about the trip, it's the liveliest party you've seen since the oni left.

You'll admit, you've been a bit wrapped up in enjoying your victory. It was years in the planning, after all. Now that it's done, Yuyuko has been very enthusiastic about celebrating with you. Half a dozen dishes of potent (and stolen) Lunar sake, and by the end of the night, you're drunk and giddy and leaning on each other for support. It's the most fun you've had together since she was excited about reviving the Saigyou Ayakashi, years ago.

Even in your... compromised state, you try to keep an eye on Reimu throughout the night. You catch her sneaking looks at you, too, as you and Yuyuko giggle on the sidelines of the night's festivities, pouring ever-larger drinks for each other. It's enough of a curiosity that, when people start drifting home and Youmu dutifully leads her inebriated mistress off, you decide to pay Reimu a visit.

“Reimu! Kanpai!” You're already seated at her table by the time she opens the door to the shrine. The Lunar sake is long gone, but you've already opened a bottle of Reimu's, and lift a dish of it cheerfully to her before tossing it back.

Reimu stares at you, probably deciding whether to make an issue of your trespassing, but just shakes her head. “Haven't you had enough for one night?”

“Ahh, you are forgetting,” you say, with drunken satisfaction. Humming, you tip the bottle up and pour another dish. Some of the sake splashes out, and thanks to your impaired judgment, you briefly consider licking it off the table before remembering that you have to set an example for this girl. You toss the second dish back just as quickly, and let out a gasp of satisfaction once the subtle aftertaste is dissolving on your tongue. “Moderation is for humans. We youkai don't need... don't have a use for such a thing.”

“How shameless,” she says, settling in across from you. “I don't know if I should have—“ But you're already pouring a second dish for her, and as you offer it over, she gives a tired smile and concedes, “One more drink wouldn't hurt.”

“Kanpai!” You toast again, and the force of raising the dish into the air leaves you wobbling. You slump forward and prop yourself up with an elbow as you drain it. Your head is swimming, and after a little consideration, you decide that it's probably best to wait a few before another drink. Conversation! Yeah, that's a thing you could do instead. “So, how was your... your firs'trip to thmoon?” The last half of the question slurs together, and you're left laughing, scandalized by your own inelegance.

Reimu politely waits for you to finish. “The moon was weird,” she says. She sits her dish down, and you immediately move to refill it. “They didn't really do much to me. They were nice, I guess. … I still don't really get what it was all about...”

“Sake, of course!” Close enough.

“Somehow, I don't believe that...” she says. After nursing the dish that you poured for her, she slumps forward to lay atop the table, with one of those tired sighs of exasperation that only alcohol can induce. “Still, I didn't know that humans could get as powerful as that girl...”

It takes a second for your alcohol-fogged mind to put things together and produce a name: Yorihime. Yeah, her. “If it makes you feel better, that technology they use 'z practically cheating. Even I can't beat it.” Without a second thought, you reach forward and pat Reimu's head reassuringly... and within seconds, transition to viciously ruffling her hair. It's still wet from the pool, and it's left sticking out at every angle.

“Y-yukari!” She jerks away from you, and in her own inebriation, she pitches backward and her knee hits the underside of the table with a thump. It's a minor disaster. The table tilts just enough for the sake bottle to topple over, and its contents splash out across her. She gives a startled squeak and fumbles to catch it, but not before a generous amount spills into her lap. As she fusses over her clothes, you find yourself noticing every spot where they follow the contours of her body. It's just the right setup: that cute expression she gets when she's annoyed, her normally-plain shrine maiden outfit made a little more risque by the sake soaking through it in spots... and the sudden realization that Reimu is no longer the gangly girl from your memories. You can feel a new heat burning in your cheeks, one that has absolutely nothing to do with the alcohol, as without thinking about it, you slide around the table until you're next to her.

“Look around for a towel or something. I—“ Reimu trails off as you lean in. Your face hovers mere centimeters from hers, until you spot a little of the sake glistening on her neck. You lean in with an unsteady giggle, press your tongue to it, and draaaaag upward.

The taste of the sake is mostly overwhelmed by the taste of, well, Reimu. You... have no complaints.

“W-what are you doing?!”

“It tastes good like this, too...” you say with an unsteady lilt, and swipe your tongue playfully across her neck. “There's more than one way for a youkai to to eat a little human girl, y'know...”

You don't put up any resistance as Reimu tugs away, and even in your current state, you realize the depths of your mistake before you even see her face. She wipes your saliva from her neck with the back of a hand, blushing and bewildered. Part of you is quite pleased that she doesn't look entirely disgusted. “You're a pervert when you drink, sheesh,” she says, wiping her hand clean on her skirt.

It's not the first time you've wanted to do something like that, but it'd damn well be the last. Definitely the last. It's amazing how quickly you can sober up when you put your mind to it. You fold your hands in your lap and give a slight bow of your head, taking care to look suitably chastised. “Of course, you're right,” you say, proud at how steady you manage to keep your voice. “Forgive me for my indiscretion. It was only the alcohol talking.”


	4. "I'll always be here for you.”

Reimu has been crying in your lap for a good ten minutes, and you still don't even know what it's about. Something to do with the Kirisame girl. She hasn't been able to stop sobbing for long enough to explain the situation.

She's a wreck, though, that much is clear. What can you even do? She doesn't react when you stroke her hair. You whisper soft reassurances, but you're not sure if she's even hearing them. You've executed plans that impacted the lives of most of Gensokyo's residents, dueled vampire lords and Lunarian god-queens... but right here and now, you feel as powerless as any human.

After what feels like an eternity, she finally trails off into weaker sniffles, and you're prepared. "Do you feel better?" Silently, you grab a cup of water from the table and sit it on the floor, just within her reach.

Like everything else, it's a calculated move, and it pays off. Reimu eyes the glass for a moment, then pushes herself up to sitting with a grunt and scoots out of your lap. "Not really," she mumbles, before taking a sip of water. "I'll live, I guess."

You smooth your dress out. There's a damp spot in your lap where her face was pressed, but... well. It's not your main priority right now. "Are you going to tell me what's wrong?"

She takes another sip and sits the water aside. "It's nothing."

"I know you. You didn't cry for ten minutes over nothing."

Reimu only lowers her eyes and goes silent in response. Well, if she won't cooperate, you have your ways. She watches with tired disinterest as you swipe a hand in front of yourself. Under your fingers, the air parts into a large gap. "What are you doing?"

"Well." Silently, another gap opens up behind the girl. You thrust both of your arms into the nearer one, and she has just enough time to notice your hands reaching out from behind her before they close in, wrap around her waist, and yank her backward through the gap. " _This_."

Reimu lands in your lap with a squeal, and kicks a few times in protest as you tug her back to sit against you. When you first started training her, this would have been comfortable. Now, she's as big as you are. You're still able to lean forward just far enough to murmur in her ear, "Remember, I have ways of making you talk, little girl."

"I'm really not in the mood," she grumbles, but doesn't resist when you settle her securely back against you. You interlace your fingers over her stomach, and she finally seems to accept that you won't let her off that easily. "I had a fight with Marisa, okay? We... aren't seeing each other anymore."

You pause and let those words sink in. The logical part of your mind knows you should be sad for her, and on some level, you are. The two made a good youkai-hunting team, and a good couple. But Marisa isn't exactly the ideal partner for continuing the Hakurei bloodline. You tried to discourage the relationship from the beginning.

It is possible, you will concede to yourself, that you were also a little jealous. But this is about Gensokyo's future; you wouldn't allow your emotions to cloud your judgment on such an important subject. It's simply better that things ended like this. Not that Reimu needs to hear you say that. Right now, she needs you to be supportive, not to act like a jealous girlfriend. You give her a tight squeeze. "I'm sorry to hear that. Is there anything I can do to help?"

"I doubt it. I mostly just want to be alone."

Not that she moves from your lap. You take the chance to get a better look at her. Her eyes are still puffy and red from crying, with dark circles under them that suggest she's missed a few nights of sleep. Her hair is hanging loose and unkempt. If you had to take your guess from the state of the shrine, she probably hasn't done much cooking lately. She always _has_ refused to ask for help until it's too late.

But that's why you're here.

You drag your fingers back through her hair, parting lightly combing it, and she leans back against you without protest. Slowly, you straighten it out, then start gathering it into two bundles.

"What are you doing?"

"An experiment. Now, shush." Holding one of the bundles in one hand, your other reaches through a small gap and emerges directly into your junk drawer. It's an eclectic mix of minor magical novelties, household bric-a-brac, souvenirs from the outside world, and detritus that Chen has carried home. Rummaging in it completely blind, it takes a minute or two before your fingers brush against the item you're looking for. You pull it out, coax one of the colored bands off of it, and then slip it over the bundle of hair. You have her attention now, and she's straining to look back as you slip the other one on. With another quick gap, you retrieve a hand mirror and hold it up. "Take a look."

Reflected over Reimu's shoulder, you can see the front view of the pigtails you just gave her... and the slight struggle on her face as she tries to maintain her expression. "Don't you think I'm kind of old for this look?"

"Hmm, are you? You humans are so short-lived, I can't keep track." You can, of course. "What will you be this year, eleven?"

" _Twenty_ ," she says, in an exasperated look-I'm-trying-to-be-sad-here tone.

"I don't really see the difference," you say, and let a bit of a joking edge sneak into your voice this time. Reimu seems too tired to argue, but... now it's at least a less anxious kind of tired. She leans more of her weight back on you now, and her eyes slip closed You slide one arm around her again to hold her close. "Mmh, Reimu?" you say, after a few minutes of this.

"What?"

"When was the last time you ate?"

Even with her eyes closed, she manages a bit of a guilty flinch. "I don't know. Yesterday?"

"Hmm, I thought so. That would mean you have a whole day of unused food, then. I could cook myself an entire feast while you're paralyzed with grief."

She snorts. "I don't have much except tsukemono and rice..."

"A feast of tsukemono and rice, then. ... I suppose that if you ask nicely, I'll let you have a little."

You really should pretend that you aren't just making excuses to cook for the girl, but it's not quite coming to you. She plays along anyway. "Damn greedy youkai," she says, with a yawn at the end as she gets more comfortable in your lap. "I should exterminate all of you."

"I dare you to try, shrine maiden."

She gives a tired chuckle and rests her head back against your shoulder. Her warm breath tickles against your cheek. It's strangely intimate feeling, and it takes you a moment to stop focusing on it and remember that you are comforting a student, nothing more. As you slide out from under her, she mumbles, "Hey, Yukari..."

"Hm?"

"... thanks." She self-consciously straightens her hair now that she seems a bit more collected, and hesitates before mumbling, “It's kind of sad that the only one I can depend on is a youkai, huh?”

Now you have your suspicions about exactly why Reimu was arguing with Marisa. She always has been frustrated by the magician's more laid-back approach to protecting the peace... and, you suspect, jealous that for Marisa, it is a _choice_.

A choice that she didn't get to make, thanks to the traditions that you helped establish a dozen generations ago.

It's a good thing she can't see the expression on your face. You lean over her shoulder and press a kiss to her cheek. This will only hurt her more in the long run, but your heart isn't quite cold enough for the other options right now. “Well, I will... always be here for you.”


	5. "I never loved you.”

By all reasonable measures, you've succeeded.

Reimu Hakurei has survived to her twenties, longer than many of her ancestors. The spell card system has been a success, and you're daring to hope that she'll live a long and healthy life. And tomorrow, she'll be married. A nice boy from the village; it's practically certain that a new generation of the Hakurei bloodline will follow soon enough. You ran the divinations yourself. Gensokyo's future has never been brighter.

Everything is fine. You've done your job admirably. You've just made some mistakes, and now, you intend to fix them.

“Excuse me,” you say, as you step through the door into the shrine's living quarters. It might be the last time you get to enter uninvited. After tomorrow, Reimu won't be the only one living here, after all.

The living area of the shrine is the cleanest you've seen it in years. It's never been _messy_ , but a few discarded pieces of clothing and unwashed cups usually conspire to give it a laid-back, lived-in feel. Now, not a thing is out of place. You doubt that it will last long, but the tidiness still leaves you a bit inexplicably sad.

Reimu is nowhere in sight, but on the back wall of the room, her shiromuku is hanging. The white wedding kimono is still perfect, looking more like a piece of art than a garment, even displayed on a frame like it is now. You're sure that it will look even better when she's wearing it. You reach out and run a fold of the cloth between your gloved fingers, and—

You hear the door open, then shut after the briefest pause. “If you get that dirty, you're going to have to pay for it, you know.”

It comes from behind you, but you'd know Reimu's voice anywhere. “Ah, so you're here. And here I was suspecting that you'd gotten nervous and run away to the outside world.”

“I had to go to the village to make some last-minute plans.” She steps up next to you and fusses over the spot where you'd touched the kimono. “... why are you here?”

“Hmm? I can't visit my pupil on the eve of her wedding?”

She sighs, and not one of her practiced fake-exasperation ones, either. “I'm kind of busy today, okay? I don't want to run you out, but if you're just here to drink my sake and bother me for six hours...”

“I'm not _that_ inconsiderate. I just wanted to check on you.” You close your fan and turn toward her, use it to push her chin up and inspect her face. Bloodshot eyes, hair that looks like she might have skipped a bath or two... the last time she was this bad was after the shrine was destroyed. “You've eaten?”

“Yes...”

“And gotten enough sleep lately? We wouldn't want you to have giant bags under your eyes tomorrow, now would we?”

“Yukari...” She tugs her head away from the fan and rubs at the spot where it was touching her. “You know that once I'm married, you can't just barge in here and play big sister once a week, right?”

It's a joke, but... it hurts more than it should. More than you'd expected. You raise your fan to shield the lower half of your face, in a manner that you hope looks playfully coy and not desperate to hide a frown. “Is that so?”

“ _Yes_ , it is. I'm fine, okay?” As she talks, she turns away from you and kneels in front of her table. “I'm an adult now. I can take care of myself.”

You stand at a loss for words, and she busies herself with cleaning her teapot. When the silence is too much for you to take, you step forward. “Humor an old youkai and play along one last time.” You snatch the teapot out of her hands and smirk at the annoyed expression she makes in response. “I can at least make you some tea.” She watches wordlessly as you carry it off.

The water heats on the stove, and you berate yourself the whole time that you wait for it to boil. You really should do what you came here for and leave, but so abruptly? You need to... build up to the right mood. Yes. Ease her into it. There's no need to make this worse than it has to be.

It's a nice chance to calm yourself down, and by the time you carry the freshly-brewed tea back to the table, you almost feel like you have things under control. She watches with mild annoyance as you pour two cups, and without thinking, you kneel next to her. It leaves the two of you facing the closed door, and yet neither of you get up to open it. It's like a game, challenging each other to see who will get tired of staring at a wall first.

And to your surprise, she's the first to break. She sits her empty cup down and sits in silence for a few minutes, and then, slowly, slumps down to her side until she's leaning against you. “I'm okay, I promise. It's just the wedding, you know?”

Even her voice sounds worn thin. You nod silently and sit your tea down, then turn to look at Reimu. Her head's resting on your shoulder—these days, she has to bend over a little to do it—and her hands are fidgeting with her clothes. 

This is... not a situation you were supposed to get into, but it's not one you can bear to leave so easily, either. You hesitate, knowing you should shove her away, tell her what you came here for, _something_ , but instead you do the only thing you can: You lean over and press a kiss to the side of her head. “I might be a greedy youkai, but you're still a foolish girl,” you say, so close to her hair that your breath stirs it. “You look half-dead. It's normal to be anxious before a wedding, but you should take better care of yourself.”

“Depends on why you're anxious,” she mumbles. You feel anxiety bubble up, that tight, sharp feeling at the front of your mind, and before you can find anything to say, her hand slides down to rest firmly atop your own.

“Reimu, what are you—“ You stop mid-sentence when you realize that there's a tear running down her cheek.

_Oh._

Oh, you have made a mistake.

“S-sorry,” she stammers when she realizes that you've noticed, and hurriedly dabs at her eyes with her free hand. “It's stupid, but... for a second there... I thought you might be here to stop me.” She gives a strangled laugh and presses her face against your shoulder, muffling it as she starts sobbing more openly.

You freeze, terrified to give the slightest external indication of the storm of emotions that's brewing inside you. She's put off marriage years later than any of her ancestors did, and met her fiance through introductions from a distant relation. You've met the boy, and while he seems nice enough, Reimu's face doesn't light up when she looks at him the way it used to when she looked at Marisa. The way she... looks at you sometimes. You've had your suspicions that she isn't happy with her arrangement.

“Shhh....” You squeeze her in against yourself, stroke your hands through her messy hair, try to act calmer than you actually are. Already, you can feel tears in your own eyes. This has never been about Reimu's happiness, or yours. But it wasn't supposed to end like this. Never like this.

She bawls against your shoulder until you'd swear there isn't a drop of water left in the girl, and she's left making weak choking noises. Only when she goes entirely silent do you manage to say, “I'm sorry. I didn't know...”

“I'd thought you might fix this, just like everything else,” she says, with a bitter chuckle. You open your mouth to respond, but no words come out. You're a bit beyond the point where anything you say can change this. She seems to read your silence correctly, and slowly pulls back. “I guess I probably sound pretty pathetic, huh...” She wipes her eyes with the back of a sleeve, and finally looks up to you. “Yukari, I...”

Reimu trails off, and for a few seconds of silence, you just look into each other's eyes. And then you're kissing, her lips pressed to yours and tasting of tea and she's _so close_ and you don't even know who moved first. You let out a gasp of protest as it registers that you really shouldn't be doing this, but you can't stop yourself. Not now. Without breaking the kiss, you turn on your knees to face her more fully. You stroke one hand through her hair, and it's not until you're leaning on the other hand for support that you realize that she's sliding down onto her back.

Her lips part from yours as she settles onto the floor below you. There are still drying tears on her cheeks, she's still a mess... but she whispers, “Don't stop...”

For once, you're the one off-balance and overwhelmed. Seeing her like this—laying beneath you, hair spread out on the floor, and looking in desperate need of comforting... you've had less-tempting dreams. It takes all of your willpower to put some force into your voice as you stammer, “Reimu, I don't know what you think you're—“

She hooks a hand behind your neck, and you don't resist for a moment when she tugs you down. “Stop treating me like a kid,” she says, and her annoyance is the first emotion except tired despair that you've heard from her in weeks. Her lips press to yours again, kissing more hungrily, tugging at your own, and it puts a spark of life back into your heart. Can this work? Is this... okay? You'd never dreamed that she would be the one to make the first move. She breaks the kiss with a pleased-sounding little sigh. “I know it... isn't right, but I want this. Do you understand? This is _my_ decision.”

That's when you know that she understands. That you don't need to hide it from her anymore. That she's learned to conceal her feelings. That she's old enough to understand the duties of the Hakurei shrine maiden— _all_ of her duties—and that she won't let this stop her from doing what she must. 

She's learned self-denial from the best tutor around, after all.

It's a freeing thought, and your head is swimming as you kiss along her cheek and down, each one a bit firmer than the last, until you finally bite the curve of her neck. The subtle, salty tang of sweat dissolves off her skin and across your tongue, and you shiver. It's wonderful. So... _biological_. You could certainly do this sort of thing with Yuyuko, but her supernatural body is cold and antiseptic by comparison. Yuyuko is eternal perfection, while Reimu's body is in constant motion, always growing and decaying and changing. The state it's in, here and now, will never happen again. It's a unique, once-in-eternity work of art, and it is yours alone.

You drag your lips across her skin as you pull away, and take a moment to admire the result, red crescent tooth marks glistening with saliva. “Not so hard...” she murmurs, even as she tugs you back down. Only once you're kissing along her neck again does she stop holding you in place, and both of her hands slip down to tug her top up. You reluctantly pull back long enough for her to pull it over her head and toss it away, leaving her only in her sarashi. That seems to be the point where she realizes what she's doing, and glances away, looking self-conscious as she unwinds it.

Part of you wants to dive in immediately, but you should... take your time and savor it. Yes. You take a breath to steady yourself and offer her your first genuine smile in days as you sit your hat aside. As you bend down over her, your unbound hair hangs beneath you, dragging up along her now-bared body. One gloved hand cups her cheek, while the other strokes up her side until it comes to a rest over her breast. You give it a gentle squeeze, then circle your thumb teasingly around the still-dainty nipple and purr, “Until tomorrow morning, you are mine.”  


* * *

The first birdsong of the day wakes you up, and you find Reimu still curled up against your side. At some point overnight, you moved onto the futon, although it had more to do with comfort than anything else. The fact that it eventually proved useful for sleeping is only a happy bonus. You find yourself wearing only a single stocking that you were in too much of a hurry to pull off when you undressed. If somebody walked in on this scene, everything would be ruined, but you still can't bring yourself to hurry as you stroll around and gather your clothes.

The question of what to do about all of this has been at the back of your mind all night. You still ache to find some fix for this, some way to reward Reimu's belief in you. Maybe if you'd tried it six months ago, you could have done something. Called off the wedding and... found some other way for Reimu to have a child, or convinced a distant blood relative to volunteer their daughter for the next generation of Hakurei shrine maidens, or _something_. Relying on a single lineage always was a losing proposition... if you'd only looked, maybe you could have found a loophole.

But it's a bit late for that. Running away with a youkai on the morning of her wedding won't exactly help keep the shrine open. Maybe... maybe in a few years. But not now.

You're pulling your bra on when you hear Reimu start stirring behind you. By the time you pick your dress up, she's moving. Not long after you slide into it, she steps up behind you. Her hands come to rest on your hips, and she leans over to kiss your cheek. “Morning...” she says, with a yawn at the end.

“Good morning, Reimu.” Even without looking back at her, you're acutely aware that she's still naked. If nothing else, her body feels far too warm pressed against you for two full sets of clothes to be separating you. You start pulling on a glove. “You should start getting cleaned up. It's barely ten hours until the wedding.”

“I...” Her breath catches in her throat for a moment before she sighs. “I guess I should. Last night didn't... change anything, did it?”

“No,” you agree. Although in its own way, it very much did. It took Reimu from your pupil to your equal and collaborator. “It doesn't. You're getting married today.”

She goes silent. It gives you enough time to finish gathering your things and getting dressed, and when you turn to face her, you already have your parasol in hand. She looks at you expectantly, and the sight of her naked in the morning light forces you to take a moment to gather your thoughts. You've known what you need to say ever since you arrived. You reach out and cup her cheek again, then guide her face up so that she has to meet your eyes. “Reimu,” you say. “Do you understand? I never loved you.”

You have millennia of experience at controlling your tone, and rehearsed the words in your head for a week before coming here. There's barely a mortal alive whose heart wouldn't break upon hearing those words in that grave tone. Reimu flinches, but a blush lights up her face despite it. “I think I understand,” she says. She leans forward for the gentlest kiss yet, and lingers before pulling back. There are tears in her eyes, but she still smiles as she says, “Goodbye, Yukari.”

**Author's Note:**

> If you really wanna go by the canon timeline, there's probably about a seven-year timeskip somewhere in here, but... if you go by the canon timeline, Reimu's apparently been a teenager for about 12 years, so I'm not too worried about it.


End file.
